Tag Archives: Vaccines

Something about Autism or Vindiction or Rage, Titles are hard.

The past week has been a bit of an emotional roller coaster –if there is anything the past two decades have taught me, it’s ‘stay jaded’. I can’t tell you how many times we’ve had a smoking gun in our hands and yet, remained ignored and silenced. So many, “They can’t ignore this now!” moments, followed by *crickets*.

You’d think by now the news of Robert Kennedy Jr being picked to head a vaccine safety commission would cause me to be all, “Meh. Sure. Whatever.” But, I’m more like, “Fuck Yeah!  SUCK IT. You’re allllll going DOWN!” –Apparently there is a gene for this. According to my raw DNA run through Promethease, I have the “I get knocked down, but I get up again.” gene *shrugs*.

But I also have the Warrior Gene and COMT so… flip this for me and you got it.

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Totally, mostly, ‘go fuck yourself’. –Stolen from the interwebs.

So the optimism is there… a shift in energy. I either feel it or I’m willing it. This is our year. Here’s to hoping I don’t get knocked down again.

And while I should feel mostly happy and warm and fuzzy at the thought of the public being forced to accept the truth, there is a huge part of me that is so damn angry. Angry at everyone who’s dismissed us the past two decades. Serious hate and disgust. It should never take two decades to finally listen when thousands and thousands and thousands of parents are telling the same story.

Two decades of dead and severely damaged children. I’m angry. Crimes were committed.

When Gavin was at Children’s in Pgh to get his ‘official dx’ sometime back in 1998, I was telling the team all about his fevers, constant ear infection, antibiotics, reflux… you know, the same story ALL of us had back in the 90’s when the main cause of autism was mercury, with a dash of Hep B encephalitis, and a side of MMR. They sat me down and did the “Now, now… we don’t know what causes autism but it was nothing you did.”

Fuck what now? Um, yeah. No shit. What part of my detailed medical history givin’ gave you the impression that I need validation? EVERY PARENT HAS THE SAME STORY. LISTEN TO US. I’m telling YOU because it’s YOUR JOB to figure it out. I learned my first lesson that day…

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Medical Professionals Be Like…

I have no idea what my reaction will be when the time comes… in my head it’s a 24 hour “I fucking told you so!” marathon on Facebook Live and some coke snorting off a hookers ass, because lord knows I deserve it 😉  But I know me, and I won’t feel like celebrating. I’ll still be angry. Because there is a baby who got autism from the MMR in the time it took me to write this post. Probably 10 babies. I don’t math.

Two decades of parents scratching and clawing up a hill while our enemies kept stomping on our fingers. And mad props to those ones who kept at it, because I dropped out a long time ago. I rant here and there but that is all I have in me. I’m thankful for the ones with the resources to keep going. I’m thankful for the ones who are all ‘peace, love and light’ because I’m still stuck in ‘go fuck yourself’ mode. But it takes all kinds 🙂

Cheers, warriors –the first day of the rest of our lives is just around the corner. The “Before & After” point to this story. I hope.

Why I voted for Trump, and why you should get over it.

I know I’ve been quite MIA, but brain fog and exhaustion kinda rule my world these days. I have forced myself to sit in front of the computer today to bring you this post. I’m tired of rolling my eyes in reply to the issue I’m going to discuss, without having the energy to put the sentiment in a comment. So here is my reply.

The issue: Just how dumb us autism families are who voted for Trump.
‘God bless our tiny pinheads’ according to the internet and some of my very own friends. ‘SMH, how can they be so dumb, and they are living it!’  Articles float around from every major news source about just how awful Trump is going to be for us (Which, is actually Main Stream Media code for “Trump is going to be so awful for our pharma ad revenues” –because, really, main stream media didn’t give a damn about us before Trump, and they seriously do not give a damn now).

Here’s the thing… just how great did Obama make my life? Over his 8 years I saw services cut left and right. I saw a man enter the Presidency who was cautious about vaccines, who later backtracked with his condescending “Look,” (grrr I hate that) ‘trust the CDC, get the vaccines.’ Our lives didn’t get better under Obama. Things are actually worse for ME and MY SON. Obama did nothing for autism. No help. No help for adults. No plan for the oncoming tsunami of adults who need 24/7 care. No real effort to end the crisis. Nothing. He ignored the CDC Whistle Blower, he turned a blind eye. He is complicit in this mess.

Yes, I voted for Trump. A decision I made last minute. I was aware that Trump knew vaccines caused autism, but he hadn’t spoken of any plans to do anything about it. There was my hesitation. Up until a week before the election I was still the idiot bashing my Trump voting friends, just like some in the community continue to do. But Levi Quackenboss published a blog post a few days before the election that changed my mind. Levi told us of meetings between Trump & Wakefield. I trust Levi. It changed my mind.

Maybe Trump’s cuts in office will affect middle and upper class America. But, hate to be telling you how voting works, I didn’t think twice about them when I voted. I voted for me. I voted for my son. Our lives truly cannot get any worse. If they did it would mean that I am homeless and at that point with nothing to lose, I would camp out in front of my state capitol building.

Our country is on the track toward collapse, however –we simply cannot pay for the damage done to two generations of kids at this point. Maybe I’d shed a tear for the middle and upper classes a little bit if the vast majority had listened to me and my tribe for the past two decades as we shouted from the rooftops, “VACCINES ARE CAUSING AUTISM!” “Injecting BABIES with MERCURY is STUPID!” We tried to warn you. The chickens are comin’ home, my dear tens of tens of readers. 😉

So, there I was with a choice between the candidate who was a status-quo-pharma-ho and the one who doesn’t give a shit what you think, beholden to no one but his own ego*, and knows that vaccines cause autism.  There was really no contest. (*I say that with love in my heart. No judgement.)

And so far… my vote, has paid me back. President Elect Trump just appointed Robert Kennedy Jr to head up a vaccine safety commission.

Kennedy knows, and has the science to prove that vaccines caused my son’s autism (you all have the science too, just read it). He speaks of justice. To me, justice is compensation. Kennedy knows that the NVICP is useless. Kennedy knows that my son deserves justice for his brain damage, and that the people responsible need to face the consequences. That is WHY I voted for Trump. He’s done MORE for ‘autism’ (and the viability of this nation going forward) this past week than any president before him. And if you don’t think this is a ‘viability of a nation’ issue, then you haven’t been paying attention.

Oh, I know what some of you are thinking, “Silly girl, vaccines don’t cause autism, there is no study that links it! Bless your little pinhead!” To that I say… *eye roll* If you still say that… If you still believe there is no link, then hear this well, your ignorance is embarrassing. There is no excuse in 2017 to not know the facts.

Yes, I am living it. Yes, I voted for Trump, with good reason, and I am not sorry. And I’m not stupid. And I’m not a hillbilly. And I’m not racist. All things I ignorantly and emotionally said about Trump voters just a couple months ago. And you voted for Clinton, or Gary or Mickey Mouse, or no one. It was your right, it was my right. If we learn anything from this election, let it be that we need to work with our differences. And judging someone, calling them foolish, because they didn’t vote with YOUR best interests in mind, is pretty douchey.

Here is the fun part. I’m going to start a “Trump-o-meter” a… “Trumpstruction Report” um… a “Has Trump made my life better or worse” tally…. As you can see, I can’t settle on a name for it yet, but whatever we decide to call it (ideas?), it will run for Trump’s 4 years and it will document if having Trump in office has made our lives with autism better or worse. And I will be honest, because this is my brain-damaged, life-robbed, son we’re talking about. So far, we’re up. He’s not even in office yet and I have a promise a vaccine safety commission, led by a brilliant man who has the proof that vaccines cause autism.

So watch for that page coming soon to the website.

Yes, I am living it. I’ve been living it for 18 years and 11 months. I’ve been ignored. Marginalized. Called crazy, desperate, anti-science (oh, the fucking irony!). A lost cause. Now my team is up and the rest of you are just going to have to brace yourselves to accept the reality you’ve been denying for decades.

Fun Fact: Jimmy Stewart had mercury dropped directly onto his vocal cords for his ‘worn out’ voice in this filibuster scene.

As always, gold stars to those who point out my typos.

Fishies: On vaccines, fishies, autism and coincidence.

This meme recently caught a second wind over on my old facebook page, Autism Wars. People are sharing it. Good. I hope it makes some think.

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Here is the story behind the moment the sentence “Vaccines are the leading cause of coincidence in the United States.” popped into my head. I was reading “Unraveling the Mystery of Autism and Pervasive Developmental Disorder” by Karen Seroussi, and she mentions how “fish” was her son’s last word, because there was an aquarium in the waiting room at the doctors office when she took him for his MMR. I about fell off my chair. Me Too. Gavin Too. “ishies” was his last word… because there was an aquarium in the waiting room at the doctors office when I took him for his MMR. I wondered how many moms had that same story.

I laughed to myself when I pictured the medical community saying, “Tapping on fish tanks and saying “Fish”” is linked to autism! Get rid of your fish tanks!!

I thought about all the other “coincidences” that all our kids have in common. The ear infections, the gut trouble, the eczema, the timing of the regression… All, ‘coincidentally’ following vaccines. And there it was… vaccines! Vaccines are to blame for the epidemic rise in coincidence in this country!

Insert: *eye roll*

You know, true scientific method doesn’t ignore even the smallest of coincidence. It studies it. Our CDC did study it… and they found that MMR vaccine was linked to an increase in Autism in black boys and individuals with isolated autism (which, is pretty much all our kids). And then they reworked those numbers to make it go away. Don’t believe me? Go see Vaxxed.

Don’t stay misinformed. You don’t have to. Fish tanks in doctors offices don’t cause autism. Vaccines can, however, and vaccines do. You have to look at what is biologically plausible. You have to understand that autism isn’t a “thing” in and of itself. It’s a label slapped on a box that holds a list of symptoms. What causes all those symptoms? Start here, 124 studies that support the vaccine/autism connection.

They lie.

[Quick Hello first: I haven’t wrote a blog in forever. I’m exhausted on a daily basis. I do my ranting on Tsu and Facebook mostly, and then regret not turning it into a blog. So many things I should be writing about right now like the movie Vaxxed, and Andrew Wakefield and Del Bigtree, and Tribeca, and vaccines and Bob Wright. I will. I just wanted to rewrite a post that was on the old blog in some form but I don’t think I moved it over here, or perhaps it is here and I’m repeating myself, but it could use a little repeating.]

I have a million guesses as to why the average person finds it so hard to believe that the CDC would lie to them and cover up vaccine findings. I’m sure it’s a combination of many things. I saw something once that makes it easier for me to believe (I mean, besides watching my own child’s health tank with each round of vaccines, and reading all the research and medical books, etc.). Something that sat tucked away in my mind, to be pulled out later in a moment of, “Well, yeah, I’ve seen them make records disappear.”

I was stationed at Walter Reed when they had a group of men in for some medical testing regarding Gulf War Illness. This was 1995.
I was living in the student barracks, which were also medical hold and guest barracks in some sections. I would not only run into the men at work, but I’d see them around the barracks. I was on guard duty one night, sitting at the desk and chatting with one of the guys. They were getting ready to leave in the next day or two and he was telling me that when he went to get a copy of his medical records they weren’t there. He was told that there was no record of him having been seen, and he wasn’t the only one.

Naive me, “Oh c’mon! I took your x-ray. They have to be here.”
Now, I don’t remember if I had a computer there to pull it up, or if I followed up at work the next day –memories fade. I just remember being at our computer system and not being able to pull up his name. He was gone. Erased. I went to the file room. The films would be there, they had to be. Originals are never signed out. Gone. I had the names of a couple other guys, and same story. Gone from the computer. Gone from the file room. Gone. They couldn’t get copies of their own medical records from their time at Walter Reed, because apparently they were never there, evidence be damned.

I had heard stories later about how Gulf War records were “misfiled”, medical and otherwise. Some were sent to the main record facility, and they filed them not by name, or medical record number, but by date of visit and clinic, at least that was the story at the time.  Some were never found at all.  Remember too, at this point they were still denying that gulf war illness was a thing.

Misfiling paper records could be chalked up to incompetence. Computer records deleted might also be, but not when they match up to missing paper records. That speaks to something intentional.

Do a quick google search for Gulf war missing records. You’ll find some interesting reads. It’s a sad rabbit hole to go down when you start to read all these personal stories. Not only were medical records gone, but records of troop movements, gone. Anything to show where the troops were in relation to “toxic plumes”, gone. After action reports, gone. Vaccines administered, not entered into the records. So I guess I am not surprised that records of the “study” on troops would vanish immediately and the men given nothing but shrugged shoulders from head scratching employees saying, “Hm. Weird. I dunno.”

The government is fully capable of manipulating data, records and history to fit their needs. I wish I had thought harder about what I witnessed before I trusted the same people to vaccinate my child.

Dear Mr. President…

Everyone of you who signed the petition against mandatory vaccines from the White House petition site already know where I am going with this. We got an email update about the petition today telling us how wonderful vaccine are. (*vomit*).
It was a video from the same clown who did the morally void video with Elmo telling kids why they should get vaccines, undermining parents authority, yadda yadda yadda….

You know the one… This one. One’s a mindless puppet being controlled by a hand shoved up its ass, the other a loveable children’s character…

.IFWT_-SurgeonGeneral

Well, when that fuckwad showed up in my inbox this morning it was easily ignored.

But as I scrolled to the delete button something caught my eye…

“And as the President himself said earlier this year, “There is every reason to get vaccinated, but there aren’t reasons to not.”

I’m sorry? There aren’t reasons to not?
I can give you $3 Billion dollars worth of reasons. NVICP.
I can give you 1 in 68 reasons.

Let me introduce you to the reasons not to.

It’s name is vaccine injury. And it’s real.
Their names are Gavin and L. My kids.

Gavin because he was vaccine injured.
L. because I refused to vaccinate him and he, though he has worse MTHFR mutations than his brother, and ALL the other risk factors that his brother didn’t have, remains “autism” free.

And you can GFYS along with all the other campaign promises that you pissed on re: Autism. GMOs.

Mr President, congrats on being just as much of a scum licking douche bag as the last guy. At least GWB didn’t pretend that he was good people. We got a douchebag in office and had to live with it. But you Sir, pretended to care. And so I hoist a hardy “Fuck You” your way (I saluted when I said though, out of respect of the office, if not the man.)

Oh and… P.S. Let me introduce you to the CDC Whistle Blower, William Thompson. He has a few reasons “not to” –call him up.